5 posts tagged “books”

The other day I visited a psychic book store. I went in search of candles. I'm big on "candle magic" that really isn't magic. Everything in our world is alive, every cell and molecule is living and vibrating in some form. It's why we have ghosts, spirits and can minipulate vibrations.

I like candles. I like inscents. I think it sets the mood and channels the right vibrations that you're looking for. I believe in the spirits of light for cleansing negative environments. Basically I believe what most cosmic free-thinkers believe, however I think it's far more our own doing than a goddess or spirit. I really do believe when I light a candle and chant my own chants that I am drawing the attention of some metaphysical beings. However, I think I'm also releasing a special sort of energy of my own that is just as helpful as whatever I'm channeling. In geek speak that would be, I'm uploading as much as I'm downloading.

Later on I talked to my mother on the phone and just casually mentioned that I had finally found an appropriate candle store for my needs. She questioned me endlessly on why, what for and how to of what I do in my spiritual candle practices. I told her and she got really excited as if I had unlocked something within her. She wanted to try. She wanted specific instructions as to how to do this. She asked why I never told her I had always done this before. I said, "I thought everyone did this."

It's not naive of me to think that everyone realizes they are cosmic beings and should take the time to meditate in their own way, in turn cleansing their environments and making them more comfy. I just have always done it. Not always with candles, but I've always done it. It slowly manufactured itself through standard prayer and soon turned into just my thing. It's something you do forever and eventually assume everyone else has caught on just like you. Even if they haven't.

All that reminded me of a moment while I was in that psychic book store. I saw a lot of people coming in for readings. There were a lot of people there for readings and a lot of psychics to give them what they wanted. I am skeptical that most of them were really psychics. I actually think that most of the people who say they are psychics are just more like myself. People with a broader understanding of things and a calming vibration. I have always been able to get people to tell me everything and anything without even asking. That doesn't make me psychic. It may be a natural talent, but predicting the future and reading things by looking at the lines on your hands is far more cool than what I've got going on.

At one point a psychic came out to greet her customer and said, "I see why you needed to come in. You've got a lot going on!" The woman sighed deeply and nodded sadly. All I could think of was, "Bullshit, of course she's got a lot going on. Don't we all?"

That's when I got to thinking, I don't need a psychic. I already know what my problems are and how to fix them. Then for a moment I pondered, do psychics see psychics? That would be like Yoda needing the help of Ghandi. If you're psychic and you have an empathic quality in that then you shouldn't have to ask anyone else what's wrong with you.

I might see a very talented palm reader. That is attractive to me. But most people go see psychics to get help on the present day. They're interested in their future based on what they're doing today. I'm more interested in my future as it stands, not by my actions of it today. That would probably be because I don't believe that we do anything "wrong" and that whatever we happen to do today was the right thing. You can't change what happened so then it must have been meant to happen.

 For most of my life I have slipped and slid through this universe. I have let myself flow as much as possible. The only restrictions I have felt were man made obstacles. Those I avoided as much as possible. Even while working a normal job I have found ways to mix up my life as to still be able to flow with the universe. I will not become a rat on a wheel even if someone eventually locks me in a spinning wheel. I'll still figure out how to run different than all the other rats. I think that's very healthy. Too many people follow a daily pattern and our lives were not setup for a daily pattern. We're supposed to flow. And this ... you should just know.

I've recently formed a personal rule never to read reviews of books I know I want to read. When I do, I find myself distracted by my own thoughts wondering how all those reviewers couldn't have enjoyed this book as much as I. It ruins part of the experience of reading a book.

This was the case with Goldie Hawn's autobiography, A Lotus Grows in Mud. Most of the original reviews I read chastised this book for being more about her charitable work and less about her. They were so completely off the mark. That's yet another perfect example of "normal people" looking for your average "normal autobiography." People and their damned cookie cutter mindsets drive me bananas.

At first I was a bit unsure of what was going on with this book. After a couple of chapters I finally dug the flow and saw that this book is Goldie Hawn. It's got a refreshingly different layout with a non-stop giggling presentation; that's so Goldie. The text of the entire book is dark blue with pinkish purple accents. It's outside the box and that's so refreshing for a biography. As she points out in the preface she isn't about to gossip and go on about any scandalous business in her life. I'm sure a lot of those "normal people" were disappointed with that!

Over all, this book is a very good summary of her life. It covers the most inspirational and molding times for Goldie. I was impressed because without going into great detail and not delving too scandalously deep she presented a very good book full of a detailed life. Some of the things that most people dwell on in biographies were not even mentioned, just assumed. Like marriages, births and other "firsts" that are usually rather important. Yet everything was presented in a way that you got the picture and you didn't feel like anything was overlooked.

Whenever I make a choice to read something I don't do it just to absorb the knowledge, I do it in hopes to change my life. At this time of my life I am desperately gathering thoughts to form where my spirituality lays. I'm trying to become a better spirit and find that connection I flirt with through my watered down meditations. When I saw Goldie had just published this autobiography I thought, you can't get much more spiritually deep than Goldie Hawn. I can't look at the woman without thinking she is one of the wisest connected hippies of our time.

She focused a lot about her career in the first half and her search for joyous spiritual connections in the latter. The only disappointment was that when she began to focus on her spiritual journey (early 1990's to present day), she neglected to keep talking about her movie career.  I suppose this is a clear example of where her priorities are. Still disappointing because the movie I was obsessed with as a child and the one I wanted to hear talked about in this book was Death Becomes Her. Released in the early 90's and not given one single mention in this book.

With a watered down non-ending (continuing with the very Goldie feeling) I'd still suggest this book to anyone with an open mind. It is more than a biography, it's very spiritually educational on a humanitarian level. And coming in at almost 500 pages I managed to absorb it in only two weeks.

When I was a child the public and private school systems forced me to read certain books. That or they forced certain books to be read to me. This was an applauded effort being made to get our children to read, but the problem is it was all the wrong stuff! Over time, forced book report after forced book report, I grew a hatred for books. You see the problem was that people can not suggest reading material for people (or children) like myself.

I suppose the average "society brainwashed" child enjoyed books off the suggested reading list. They read things like Goosebumps or The Baby-Sitters Club. Children relate to these things. They must have thought, "Oh I'm just like so-n-so!" These things helped build character. Their character, not mine! These books ruined me. Along with such things as Twenty Thousand Leagues Under the Sea, The Old Man & The Sea, and Hamlet. I was not interested and by far too intelligent to be fooled into reading these selections.

All through my early high school years I turned in book report after book report on these sorted boring titles and I not once cracked the spine of any of those books. I'd read the back cover and somehow gather enough info to make an impressive book report. Convincing enough to get an A+ without reading a page. I remember my favorite literature teacher once marked my book report "A++, You really understand the material." All that praise when I didn't read a word of it! I didn't realize it then, but I now know I understood the material for sure. I understood regular human behavior enough to know exactly what normal boring people would write about in these boring books. Not saying Shakespeare was a boring person, but he was predictable for disturbed young artists like me. The only book I ever read as a child or teen that I enjoyed was Our Town. Bunch of dead townies telling a story, now that's my kind of book!

If I was provided with books that would relate to me as a child then perhaps I would have been a reader from the very start. Instead I was given books that fell way short. They didn't link up to me. I was a very quick and smart child. I was more interested in psychology by age 8 than I was in whatever other children were. I was experiencing multiple personality disorder and molestation while my friends still were learning to jump rope. If I could have read something that related to me I would have been hooked.  But society doesn't let children read The Satanic Witch, The Devil's Notebook, or The Only Bush I Trust is My Own. Not that those particular books existed when I was a child, but books like them did and it was those books that I needed to build my foundation. If I would have read anything like them I would have known that there are people out there just like me and it's not such a bad thing. If I would have known that revolutionary people like Guy Fawkes, Lord Rochester, Aphra Behn and even Marquis De Sade existed my entire life would have been reformatted far more to my liking.

After I graduated high school I didn't read for several years. I was raped by mainstream books. It really was like mental rape. This long line of books coming into your mind when you don't want them, need them or care to know what they have to say. I'm a Leo, I want to know about me, not you. I was aching to read books that spoke to me and not to everybody else.

One of the first two books I remember reading and enjoying as an adult was The Satanic Witch by Anton LaVey and Leah's Book of Rules for the World by Leah Delaria. I can honestly say the first thought that came to mind after reading these books was, "I can't believe they let people like me publish books!" Until that very moment I had absolutely no idea that there were books out there worth my attention. 

Take a moment and picture this book-filled world we're living in. Where we encourage children to read but we don't really encourage them to read what they want. Sure, we let them loose in the library or the annual book sale at the school, but yet the selection is always limited. We let them choose, but only choose what we want them to. They will not be able to stumble upon what really may connect with their soul.

It's taken me several years to warm up to reading. I started out reading very slowly. I needed to soak up every single word. Now I have the ability to read quickly, but I still prefer to go slow. I like to live every word. I'm a writer and an artist, so I need to absorb these things in that way. As you may have gathered it took me close to three months to read Jane Fonda's 600-page biography.

Yes that's right, a writer! I'm a writer now. I have books published. That's the most funny thing to me. That someone with my history of disliking books has become a person who has any ability to write them. And now that I've written all the books I care to for now, I read books voraciously. I have a hunger most for biographies because I long to know other people like me existed and succeeded.

I rarely stray from reading things that will make me a better person and soul. I want to read so much, but I take so long with each book. If I went any faster I might miss something! There's so much I want to absorb and I hope I get the chance to do so. Which is what makes me so bitter about my childhood with books. I could have soaked up so much more by now if "the system" didn't teach me to be disgusted by all literature.

Which is really the point of this article. Let's give our children a bit more credit to really choose selections in which appeal to them. I could have matured years ahead of my current self if I was left to read things like Freak Unique and The Satanic Bible. I wouldn't have felt so alone if I was allowed to read biographies by Roger Vadim, Mae West, Tallulah Bankhead, Cybill Shepherd and Gloria Vanderbilt. I would have connected with who I really am just like all those other people connected with themselves by reading The Baby-Sitters Club. 

Reading! It's not as boring as you may think it to be. It's worth taking the time for. I remember those nerds who used to say a good book was as inspirational as a movie. I thought they were such losers! How could you be so moved by a book? And today I sit weeping, absolutely bawling, while I read a certain biography. I picture things in my head. I can't put down books because they are exciting and like films in print! Who'da thunk it!?

I would be fibbing about this post's inspiration if I didn't tell you it was because of Kirk. So, thank you Kirk.

I have absolutely been blown away by this book. It is by far my most favorite biography. I want to buy another copy and pass it around America, because they need to read it and I certainly am never giving up my own copy. This right here is a bible for what should be our current culture. Pete has been through so very much. His open minded and expressive childhood to a lot of his adult tragedies have made him the perfect human being. His mind works in an amazingly mysterious way. He's so open and wise.

Whenever I saw him on Celebrity Big Brother UK what I noticed most was how he'd always ask questions. For example someone said Dennis Rodman called himself the King and Pete asked, "King of what?" I don't know about you but that strikes me as different. Most people, including myself, would just think he meant he was the king of everything. It's the little things like that. And this book is an extension of all of his incredible observations and opinions, packed together into biography form.

And I have never heard anyone agree with me on my observations of Hollywood. He said as he traveled into Hollywood he could feel the desperation in the air. Hollywood is the most desperate place in the world because it wreaks of a twisted and greedy type of desperation. I got that feeling too. I have the same feeling whenever I approach Las Vegas. The greed and thick suffocating despair my soul feels when I'm passing through these places almost brings me to tears every time.  

Some quotes from the book. I've been waiting until I was done with it to be sure I found all the gems. Even though the entire book is a gem.

"That's what people mean when they shout at you in the street. 'Faggot!' 'Queer!' 'Transvestite!' ... all they're trying to say is, 'I'm here too!'"

Talking about Courtney Love's intelligence, "And I know she's in trouble, but when you're that raw and that intelligent, sometimes you have to try and slow yourself down, and you do that with drugs. It's like when a baby throws a rattle across a room and screams because it can't communicate. Courtney Love's got that. And she's dangerous, because she knows a lot about the music industry, politics and hypocrisy, and she could have a voice. And people don't want a voice like that. So she's shouting into a vacuum, and the inevitable result is the drugs and the drink and the rehabs and the violence."

"[George Galloway] told me of a message that was passed on in wartime, where the first person said, 'Send reinforcements, we're going to advance,' and when it reached the end it had become, ' Send three or four pence, we're going to a dance.' And that totally summed up society these days to me - it said everything."

You should save your pennies and get this book. I don't think it'll ever see shelf life in America as not even the publishing company is international. And if you're in the UK then you'd be foolish not to pick this one up. It's just truly inspirational. Pete Burns needs to change the world.

What books are on your nightstand?

It's turning out really well, I look forward to reviewing it. I had this air mailed in from England it was so important to me. It's not available in the US and I don't know if it ever will be. It can be found here.